Well, I’ve been a blogcrastinator. I’ve been thinking a lot lately about writing and why I do it. But more on that later this week. On to the monthly check-in. In fact, I think it’s time for a 5-months-in check-in. But before that, can someone please, please, PLEASE tell me how we’re already nearly halfway through this year?

It’s funny how hard it is to get everything right. At the same time. While I have not adhered to 100 percent daily activity, I’ve definitely been rocking the bicycle. It’s been really nice out, but what’s really sealed the deal is having a friend to ride with! I helped Victor pick out a super-rad Gary Fisher from the Bike Project, and now we both ride to work and have fantabulous lunch rides. The only downside is this: riding is more fun when you have some place to end up. Like a restaurant. Or a cupcakery. So, needless to say, I’ve been eating out more than once a week.

But, we also now have the added perk of making every day casual Friday – every day we ride our bikes, that is. It’s an awesome deal! Olsen rewards us for taking care of the environment, which is totally a win-win. Plus it means more incentive to ride the bike, which means more exercise for me. Which is a win. So, my resolution is to ride my bike to work and/or go on just-because rides at least four days a week. And the rule is, if it doesn’t happen [because sometimes there are client meetings and bad weather, etc] I need to get on the elliptical or go for a walk. Because even if I’m not In It To Gym It, I’m still trying to be healthier [and putting it in boldface totally makes it more commitment-y].

I’ve also introduced meat back into my diet. I’m still trying to keep my breakfasts and lunches vegetarian [or at least pescatarian], but it’s nice to have some meat in moderation again. And it’s nice to be able to share the same dinner with my boyfriend again. I still really enjoy experimenting with my cooking, and meat or not, I’ll keep doing that.

My other resolution [in addition to all the continuing points-tracking, eating more vegetables business] is to pinch my pennies. Because internet, I’m house shopping.

pause for omg

And so I need to better prepare myself for all the exciting things [furniture! paint! gardening!] and not so exciting things [HOA fees? Taxes? Maintenance?!] that come along with it. So, while I’ve always been pretty good with money, I’m going to really start watching what I spend [except for the weekend of May 20].

And the other resolution is to not lose sight of my health and fitness among all of the crazy that my life might soon be.

Somehow, at some point during the writing process, this quickly went from a happy-go-lucky “it’s spring!” post to an extremely vulnerable post. So I’m going where the words take me, and I’m putting it all out there.

That whole shpiel about my blood pressure, and how I need to make sure I’m getting physical activity every day, even if only 10 minutes?

i suck.

I was really great about walking outside or getting on the elliptical every day. For about a week. I just .. have no idea what my problem is! I feel in such a rut. I know two things: that I want to be outside, and that my body wants to move. I also know that my mind gets in the way. My mind wants to be lazy and catch up on shows and skip the exercise. So I’ll say it again.

i’m in a rut

It’s not that I don’t have the desire to be in better shape. To feel better about my body. To be healthier. To have endorphins that put me in a better mood. I want all of these things.

But I just don’t know how to want them enough. I need to want them more than I already want them. Because the amount of wanting I have going on right now just isn’t enough. I can make excuses all day long for why I don’t get more activity. But the real reason is clear: I don’t want it enough. I have to want it hard enough, long enough to make it a routine.

I know that it’s part winter blues and part lack of a “buddy,” but this is a recurring struggle in my life.

“When the weather is nicer, I’ll ride my bike to work more …”

“When Brad gets weekends off again, we’ll [insert fun outdoors-y activity here] together …”

It shouldn’t have anything to do with the weather, Brad’s schedule or the fact that I have no one in my life that lives close enough, enjoys the same activities and share’s a similar schedule [which is kind of depressing to me in itself].

So, I need to figure out how to be better at wanting what’s good for me.

so in april, i have just one resolution

To get physical activity, even if it’s only a 15-minute walk, every day. But this time, the difference is I’m going to focus on WHY I want the physical activity.

I’ve recently added the “In It To Gym It” blog to my reader for hopes of getting inspiration from others like me, and others who are so completely different from me. For now, I’m just lurking [and feeling inspired], but maybe one day soon, I’ll actually join in.